I have always had identity crisis. Not so much who I am. More so who other people thought I was. I have always felt a bit like an outcast, yet included. Is that weird? Because of my many characteristics and personality traits, I have blended in with different groups. That can be a good or bad thing. I found it hard to be completely myself.
I love all types of music. I like to knit. I like dance. I like to read. I like to sing. I like to build things with my hands. I like to play in my hair. I like to tell jokes. I like to laugh loudly with my mouth wide open. I enjoy having conversations about taboo subjects. I love hair. I like to make kids laugh. I like makeup. I love sci-fi everything. And so much more. But my problem is, am I accepted just as I am?
When I was growing up, I remember doing a little skit in my 6th grade English class. Being the only black girl in my class, I was told to play the “sassy” character, but they said I was doing it wrong. I needed to act more….black. I was confused because I didn’t understand what that meant. I knew then that who I was wasn’t always what people saw.
But I’ve always known who I was. It’s other people who didn’t quite understand me or either wanted to fit me into their box.
So this is for the person who gets told “You’re too [blank] to be [blank].”
Be you!!! The world will eventually catch up. And if they don’t, who cares!!! Life is about happiness. I feel much more happy being able to come home and look in the mirror and actually like the person who I am. I’ve spent years doing things to make other people happy because I felt that was where joy lived – in serving others. But don’t forget to serve yourself. At the end of the day, there is only you to answer.
So, little girl who might read this and experiencing self doubt, embrace your weirdness!!! It’s ok to be a little eccentric. That’s what makes the world awesome! To the older woman who might read this, enjoy you at every stage in your life. Our experiences truly shape our world and who we are. Love YOU! Wear those crazy clothes, laugh at that inappropriate joke, travel to that place, continue that hobby you love so much…Do what makes you happy!!!
Song Of The Post : India.Arie “Beautiful”